Wednesday, December 7, 2011

A Husband for Christmas

This Christmas season, I've been thinking about one gift in the nativity story that often gets overlooked. It was God's gift to Mary. No, I'm not talking about Jesus. A baby is a wonderful gift, but babies come with a laundry list of responsibilities and--laundry. I'm talking about Joseph.

How sweet of God to make sure Mary had a husband! When the angel came to her and everything went down, she didn't have one. And for a while it looked like she wouldn't. Joseph found out about her pregnancy and was going to take the kindest route available to him under Jewish law--he was going to forgo the stoning and just divorce her quietly. What a relief it must have been for Mary when Joseph told her of the angel coming to him in a dream. No longer facing the prospect of single motherhood (what would that have looked like in Nazareth?), she was going to have her chosen husband after all.

How nice that God talked to Joseph, too. Mary had a pretty unbelievable story. God could have made Joseph believe it from Mary's account alone, but he didn't. He sent an angel directly to Joseph in a dream and explained everything. No longer was the burden of this child growing within her completely on Mary. And no longer was the responsibility of listening to God correctly squarely on her shoulders. God could talk to Joseph too. What a confirmation to Mary's faith to hear that God told the same story to him. What an assurance that God would probably talk to both of them in the future.

How considerate that God gave Mary someone to stand with her. I've directed our church's Vacation Bible School several times. One time by myself, other times with a co-director. I much prefer the latter. Having a co-director to share ideas, help plan, and to stand with me during the opening session (even if she was in the back) was a huge psychological boost. It's like using the "editorial we" when writing opinions--it's so much nicer to pretend there's a plural rather than exposing yourself in the singular. Leadership is lonely. During her pregnancy, I'm sure Mary was grateful she had Joseph by her side as they passed Nazareth's town gossips.

I'm sure Mary was grateful Joseph was with her through labor and delivery as well. When I was pregnant with Caleb, our first child, I was glad Dave came with me, toting a pillow to the childbirth classes. I was glad he was with me watching Caleb playing in McDonald's play place and timing my contractions before we went to the hospital to have Harrison. I was thankful he was with me in the hospital when, sans drugs, I went into transition with Laurel, our third. Even when there are doctors and nurses to assist, husbands are wonderful to have around when facing the scary prospect of delivering a baby. Joseph's role was not only nice, but necessary.

How wonderful that Mary had help raising Jesus. As our kids grow older, new situations arise that call for new rules and regulations. I'm always glad that I can run decisions by Dave and not have to make the call by myself. I can check with him to see if I'm overreacting. He can back me up. I'm sure Mary and Joseph did a good job raising Jesus, but I have to admit the story of them leaving Jesus at the temple makes me feel a little better about forgetting Harrison at the pool or the time we left Laurel at church.


I'm glad that God gave me a husband for Christmas too, 21 years ago. I remember that fall I would drive from Tabor College to Wichita to spend the weekend with Dave at his mom's house planning our wedding. Sunday nights became excruciating as I had to face the hour drive back to Hillsboro and the following week without him. How wonderful it was when we were finally married and could be together. Because that was God's plan for us. It was God's plan for Mary and Joseph, too. And it was good.





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I am a freelance writer. I also work full time with our business, Franklin Lawn Service. My husband, David, and I met as students at Tabor College and we have been married for almost 20 years. We have three great kids, Caleb, Harrison, and Laurel.